2. My Unexpected Stroke

NIGHT OF MY ATTACK

Friday, January 11^th 2019: Not a date I would ever forget in a hurry.  I had many flashbacks, but my memory and thoughts at the time felt really strange and real. 

That day, I had been working on finalising the draft of our magazine, in preparation to go to print within the next few days.  Deadlines were always important to stick to, especially the usual last minute changes. No doubt, many of you in publishing, could relate to this.  I was always on “high alert” for any last minute changes, additions or alterations to the layout. I usually worked late into the night during the last week of deadline.  That was referred to as my “Grumpy Period” every 2 months, which was the time that Colin and friends would dive for cover. I would change into a pretty irritable, snappy and highly strung creature. Sorry, I couldn’t help it!

What I Was Doing

I was preparing the January / March issue, as I mentioned, it was normally a pretty stressful time for me.  You could probably imagine the difficulty of trying to get something ready just after the busy Christmas period, then I had to juggle working around Spanish Bank Holidays too.  I honestly swear the Spanish invented these breaks more than most other nations!

Tomato Festival: They even invented one in a place, where citizens threw tomatoes at each other in the town square! Just because a truck had accidentally discharged their cargo of tomatoes in the street, years ago!  I couldn’t work out the logic in celebrating that.  One of the joys of being a foreigner abroad, I suppose. 

How I Felt Before Attack: However, as I worked through the day and into the early evening, I actually felt fine.  Colin was out drinking with the guys. Most likely he had to get out, to disappear from me. The poor Man.   It was a normal friday night, so he met up with some of his drinking buddies.  He normally called me to ask if everything was “OK” and then would say, “I’ll be home soon”. That could indicate anything from 10 minutes to an hour or so. Honestly!  No doubt there have been plenty of women out there that can identify with that lame excuse. Especially as you timed your evening meal to be ready for when your other half arrived home.  However, I hadn’t minded too much that night. I had work to get on with and was happy to continue working while he was having fun.

What Happened

Colin called later that night and told me that he’d be home within “10 minutes”. Very specific, not “soon”, so it was an indication to have last minute preparations to get dinner ready, I guessed.  Yeah right!  I decided to make myself a cup of coffee, a break away from my well deserved and stress-free “alcofrolic” glass on my desk.  It was Friday. If Colin was out having fun, I justified it by the long hours I worked and a need, and well deserved, earlier “tipple”. Why not?  So what! 

I went to the kitchen and, as I was stirring the sugar into my cup of coffee, I started to feel really strange.  It was hard to fully describe but, I was aware something weird was happening.  The room started to blur and I felt an inexplicable sensation overcome me.   My legs unexpectedly gave way from under me, my arms went limp and as I collapsed / slapped onto the ground and I had a sudden urge to be sick.  I recall thinking at the time, was I actually that drunk?

My Collapse: Everything was like slow motion after that.  I tried to lift myself up, but my arms wouldn’t let me!  My mind was racing, but my body was unwilling to move properly. It was very alarming. I had lost control!  I tried to get up, but couldn’t. My hands and legs had become useless. I managed to turn over onto my butt, forced my right elbow to pull my limp body slowly toward the ground floor W.C.  I desperately wanted to be sick and rapidly started to get woozy. It was difficult and labourious getting away from the kitchen, but it was vital to get to my destination.  I knew I had dropped my phone, but couldn’t really remember where. I couldn’t go back to search, couldn’t phone Colin or anyone for help.  I was terrified!    I just knew that I had to get to the downstairs W.C., as the urge to be sick grew even stronger.

Loss of Movement: When I managed to get to the W.C., my arms just couldn’t lift my body up to the toilet bowl. I tried to suppress the need to be sick again.  However, I miserably failed and ended up vomiting all over the floor!  I had the presence of mind to realise I had made a horrible mess. I desperately tried to clear up the floor with my working right hand, while fighting with the toilet roll at the same time, to soak up the horrible evidence on the floor. My left arm and leg just wouldn’t work properly! I recall thinking that Colin would be furious at me for making such a state!  I guessed I must have passed out because everything went blank ………….

Became Aware: I roused to Colin’s voice, “I’m home, where are you?”.  I couldn’t speak, so I made moaning and grunting noises, in the hope he would hear me.  I was way past caring what he would think, when he realised where I was.  I just wanted him there.  He must have heard me, as I heard and sensed him crashing into the W.C door. He tried to shift my body away from the door opening, because I had blocked his entry.  Poor thing must have been pretty shaken when he saw me.  I heard him screaming, “Oh my God!”, “what’s the matter?”, “what have you been doing?”. I just couldn’t answer back!  I must have looked a right sight.  He tried to get me off the floor, but I couldn’t help at all. I was totally limp and a dead weight.  Somehow, he managed to drag me away toward the lounge sofa, by lifting me from under both my armpits, while my dead legs draggeded along the floor. I must have passed out again ………

Call to Emergency Services: I had lost track of time. The next time I became aware, I was laid awkwardly across our sofa, surrounded by total strangers.  I couldn’t focus properly, but could hear voices calling my name and clicking their fingers for my attention. I couldn’t respond to anything again.  There were people talking in Spanish in the background.  Colin had called emergency services, and I also heard Christian’s voice (his son from 1^st marriage). They were both talking in Spanish to these faceless strangers.  I was told the strangers were the people from the ambulance, as they tried to get me to react. In the meantime, four burly Policemen appeared.  Apparently, in Spain, Police would automatically attend when a female could possibly be involved in any kind of domestic abuse. A precautionary measure.  However, poor Colin, in his distress, had to cope with all these outsiders. He was worried about me, but at the same time, had to justify that he wasn’t the abuser.  Thank goodness he managed to convince them.  The female doctor in charge quickly confirmed that I had suffered a major stroke.

Inside the Ambulance: I sensed I had been wheeled into an ambulance.  The lady doctor had joined me. Luckily, she was on duty at the time of the call out. She knew exactly what happened, what to do, and gave me an injection.  We later reckoned that she had saved my life.  I wish that someone had noted her name. She was very kind, soothed me by lightly stroking my arms and my face.

I heard the typical ambulance siren noises, noticed flashes of light through the side windows, as we moved away.  Had all that fuss been for me?  What an embarrassment!  Where was Colin?  Apparently he wasn’t allowed in the ambulance. No idea why!

I didn’t know how long it took us to get to the Hospital, but I sensed being hurriedly wheeled along corridors, as the ceiling lights zipped by above. We got to a room. Somehow, Colin appeared out of nowhere and held my hand to comfort me. I had no idea where he came from but I felt a huge surge of relief.  

Emergency Room: The uniformed people were kind and gentle. I guessed I was in an emergency room.  The uniforms kept calling my name, clicking fingers and told me to be calm. All I felt was sheer panic, as my clothing was gradually taken off me. There was nothing I could do to stop their fast actions.  I knew that I had been repeatedly sick during that time and felt really embarrassed. Later, although Colin appeared, I was left alone with the uniforms as Colin disappeared. I wasn’t aware that he was made to wait outside then.  Lord knows what must have gone through his mind out there!

I was being Robbed!: When I was suddenly conscious again, the uniforms had started to take the off the rest off my clothes, then my rings, watch and precious necklace.  I felt I was being robbed!  Those items of jewellery were of huge sentimental value to me!  I was alert enough to realise that my watch was Colin’s first gift to me in 1986. There were my engagement and wedding rings from 1988.  My mother had a gold signet ring specially made for me from Indonesia in the 1970´s.  My necklace, was the first Christmas present from Colin in 1986. It was unique and I had never taken it off.  No way I would willingly part with all these precious things!

 When I felt my necklace sliding away from my neck, I mustered the determination to grab it with my right hand. I had a kind of tug of war with whoever tried to steal it away from me.  I must have lost as it drifted away into a misty fog.  I was really exhausted, lethargic and gave up my fight.  They must have given me something. I felt anger at their low tactics.  I began to relax, went limp and drifted off to oblivion ……..

Please view next page 3 at link “In a coma . Waking Up!: https://www.rebootinglinda.com/in-a-coma/

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