4. Waking Up After Tests

The Period During Tests:

Medical Updates: I wasn’t sure what happened after I woke up in I.C.U.  Everything was a huge blur, but Colin and my sisters later filled in the gaps, once they considered when I could handle the news.  Colin was excited and put the news out, to concerned other family and friends, by phone and social media that I had miraculously woken up. He got a surprising flow of messages back.

I was unaware there had been a number of messages from friends, while I had been in a coma. They had kindly sent their love, good wishes and prayers for my recovery. How lovely that was of them. 

Poor Colin was rather overwhelmed by calls, so he decided to take to his facebook account to post single updates of my progress.  People were really kind during that difficult time. I later discovered that Colin and my sisters had found great comfort in the knowledge of the generous support out there. Especially, when they weren’t allowed to see me until the doctors permitted.  However, they no longer felt alone, as they waited for each scrap of news.  What anguish they must have gone through, as they wondered if I would be strong enough to fight back to them. They must have made all sorts of wishes, prayers and promises to themselves during that time.

WAKING UP AGAIN

Ever had a massive hang over?  Well, when I woke again, I had an enormous headache. I felt very sluggish and it was an effort to open my eyes.  No matter how hard I tried, my eyes were glued tight shut. As I was totally in the dark, I wondered if I had gone blind!  I didn’t want to panic, as there had to be an explanation. For the life of me, I couldn’t work out what that would be.  I heard subdued voices in the background, which I sensed were to the far bottom left of my bed.  I couldn’t make out what had been said, but it must have been light hearted banter because of the occasional laugh or snigger.  Colin later told me that I had been placed back in I.C.U. The nurses’ station had been practically where I had heard the voices.  Amazing!  All that time, they thought I was completely unconscious. I actually was aware of my surroundings, in spite of no sight or movement.

Attempts to Communicate: I had no idea of time, but I sensed voices, as they moved around me. I was aware that, although I still couldn’t see, I had been lying flat on my back.  I always hated that position. I normally would get comfortable by lying on my right side, arms bent up toward my head, my right leg straight, my left leg bent and crossed over the other.  It probably sounded a weird position for some, but it had always helped me become comfortable before nodding off.  I’m not certain there is an actual name for that kind of pose.  Anyhow, I wanted to get back into my familiar position, but just couldn’t.  I wasn’t able to shift any part of my body!  Had I been restrained again?  What was going on?  Why wasn’t I able to move?  Panic set in, as I tried to make contact with the invisible voices for help.  I hadn’t cared if they were strangers. I just wanted some sort of help.  My silent screaming attracted nobody.   Was I was mute too?  After a while I decided to explore the inside of my mouth.  I tried moving my tongue round, which felt twice the normal size. I had difficulty running it over my teeth.  My mouth felt really foreign, as though someone had stuffed two sets of teeth in!  This was fast becoming a nightmare.  I was terrified, frustrated and getting very dejected.  None of my efforts of communicating worked!

No Speech: I guess I must have fallen asleep.  I had no idea how long passed when I picked up activity around me again.  I still couldn’t see, move or speak. I felt sick!  I felt someone holding my right hand. Colin’s voice drifted over and calmly said, “Don’t panic, you’re going to be alright”.  I couldn’t describe the relief I felt, knowing that he was there.  I no longer had to battle to communicate with the invisible voices – Colin would sort it all out, so I felt a great deal calmer.  I really concentrated hard on opening my eyes.  I eventually managed to half open my right eye. Everything was blurry as it adjusted to the light and started to slowly focus.  Unfortunately, I was too late for Colin’s attention. I had to watch his back disappear behind a screen or curtain, to my right.  I just couldn’t shout out or make any noises to call him back.

 Visitors: A few minutes passed by.  Eventually, I made out an opening in the screen, from the corner of my half opened eye.  I saw shadows floating around but couldn’t make them out clearly.  Apparently, they were Colin, my sisters and Christian waiting patiently for permission to see me.  One of the shadows started to move towards me. As it grew bigger, I realised that it was my sister, Susan!  What a relief that she looked fairly normal, in comparison to my coma dream. She was a bit hazy, but no longer resembled an enormous genie out of Aladin’s lamp!   I could sense she was talking softly, but I just couldn’t understand her or respond. I must have gone deaf too!  I desperately tried to tell her that I couldn’t move, and wanted my restraints taken away.  All I could manage were strange glugging noises, that came from somewhere at the back of my throat.  She looked confused, kissed my face and I drifted away.  The same thing happened when Vivian appeared.  I was getting nowhere, and became more exasperated. I realized that I no longer sensed anyone around me. Colin and sisters had left.  Why had they allowed these strangers tie me down?  However, I didn’t know that I hadn’t been tied up at all. It had all been my imagination.

Transfer Out of Hospital

I couldn’t recall seeing Colin and my sisters again.  It seemed like ages in this strange place, as I felt alone and helpless.   Eventually, I had worked out through my good eye, that the other shadows and invisible voices, had been medical staff .  When could I go home?  Why were they keeping me tied down?  I needed to let them know that I wasn’t comfortable or happy.  None of my discomfort was clear to them, as they continued to ignore me and went elsewhere.  How dare they!  I wasn’t a slab of meat on a butcher’s block.  I wanted out!  How could Colin and my sisters have been so cruel and left me there?  Why had they trusted these horrible people?  I must have wandered off back to sleep again ………

Moving out of Costa del Sol Hospital: As the darkness turned into light, my bed was wheeled away.  Although I still couldn’t speak or move, I supposed that I was finally on my way out. Homeward bound at last!  I was past caring of my inability of conversation, or that I was still tied down.  It was of great relief. I hadn’t even made any objections while they wheeled me into the back of an ambulance. I was going home!

The Ambulance: My bed had been lowered down to the floor levelas of the ambulance, so I had difficulty to see what was happening.  There was a young girl in a blue uniform.  She hadn’t said anything, but kept hold of my right hand, while she occasionally stroked my arm. When we moved off, I made out through the windows above, as we whizzed past unfamiliar buildings and trees.  I wanted to ask, “how far?” and  “how long would the journey take?”.  All I made were horrible noises. I got used to them.  The girl never answered, but continued to gently caress my arm.  I liked her, but I became impatient again.  After being jolted for a while, we finally slowed down, followed a winding road and drew to a standstill in front of a big white building.  That wasn’t home!  Where were we?  Had I been kidnapped again?

Arriving at Malaga Hospital: I had been wheeled out of the ambulance, along a corridor, stopped a couple of times, then went into an elevator.  The nice girl from the ambulance smiled, squeezed my right arm and abandoned me into the hands of two new uniformed girls.  Even more strangers!  They hadn’t seemed as nice. Neither of them spoke to me, as I tried to grunt my protests, while they wheeled me around like a parcel.  Where on earth was I?  We ended up in a large white room.  I had no idea where I was!  My bed had been “parked” to the left side of the room. The exit door was to my right, there was a TV screen mounted on the wall in front, and another closed door to the left of the TV.  To the immediate left wall, was an empty white shelf.  Had I been put into a new prison?  All the excitement tired me, so I drifted off to sleep. At the back of my mind, I was convinced there must have been a terrible mistake. Colin would sort it out, and rescue me from this nightmare.

My New Room

Rude Awakening: I must have been in a deep slumber.   They must have drugged me too!  What kind of people were these?  While I roused, I heard quite a bit of commotion around me. My head had slipped under the bed sheet during my sleep. However, I wasn’t able to move it away, to see what the racket was all about.  The top sheet had suddenly been pulled back. A dark haired woman stared right into my face.  In perfect English, she said, “Hello Linda, my name is Dr …..”. I never made out what she said next, as she chirpily continued with, “Good morning, you are in Malaga Hospital”.  I was really miffed at the disturbance, and that I had been transferred to another hospital, instead of home. I was an hour’s drive away from our house!  I tried to find my voice and failed, but rudely thought, “Go away!”, as I swept the cover sheet over my head with my right hand   The room emptied after that. All became peace and quiet, as I gradually went back to sleep again …….

Please view next page 5 at Link “In Malaga Hospital – Kidnapped Again!”: https://www.rebootinglinda.com/in-malaga-hospital/

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